funny tweets

When it comes to this here tag of Funny Tweets, it consists of any attempt on Twitter at comedy, without the necessary qualifier of succeeding. We also keep a list of top funny tweets that might be more along the lines of what you're looking for if you want actual funny tweets.

Mercury Is In Retrograde, And The Astrologers On Twitter Are Quaking| Thumbnail text - ava @avxxtarot mercury retrograde is just me fighting the urge to download tinder just to talk to people while I'm bored with the full intention of never pursuing anything or meeting them 7:33 PM · 10/2/21 · Twitter for iPhone 365 Retweets 109 Quote Tweets 2,901 Likes

Mercury Is In Retrograde, And The Astrologers On Twitter Are Quaking

funny tweets about the illogical reasons couples get mad at each other | thumbnail Text - mark @TheCatWhisprer Crazy how I get yelled at for not fluffing a pillow just right when I get off the couch but my wife's tube of toothpaste looks like a grizzly bear used it. 4:25 AM Jun 30, 2020 · Twitter for iPhone 36 Retweets 6 Quote Tweets 342 Likes

Funniest Tweets About The Illogical Reasons Couples Get Mad At Each Other

Dad Tweets That Are Funnier Than An Ill-Fitted Pair Of Dad Jeans| thumbnail text - NicholasG @Dad_At_Law Kids too energetic? Make them go on a walk with you and they'll suddenly be unable to move any part of their body. 2:57 PM · Sep 23, 2021 · Twitter for iPhone 243 Retweets 5 Quote Tweets 1,390 Likes

Dad Tweets That Are Funnier Than An Ill-Fitted Pair Of Dad Jeans

Man believes woman get pleasure from a pap smear | thumbnail text - SheRatesDogs @SheRatesDogs surely men don't think we. enjoy pap smears I mean it's not as awkward as the gyno Why's that haha What's the difference You don't have a metal contraption shoved up your vagina and people shoving things up there for tests and shit That's what I was expecting but didn't know for sure Yeah happens yearly Yea, that can get awkward especially if they hit a spot that makes you awkwardly moan once Imao Tha

Insanely Naive Man Believes Women Actually Enjoy Getting A Pap Smear

twitter thread of people's funniest hookups | thumbnail text -meth from a dove 1979 @twikipedium Replying to @Coll3enG hooked up w/a vet. when we got to her room, she took a broom and ran it under her bed. 5 cats emerged from under like bats out of hell. fast fwd to me being on top. felt something scratch my bare as. over and over. looked back and there was a cat licking my left buttock. 8:39 PM · Apr 23, 2019 · Twitter Web Client

People Reveal Their Funniest Hookup Stories On A Twitter Thread

Sassy Comebacks Women Gave After Receiving Unsolicited Pregnancy Advice | Thumbnail text -

Sassy Comebacks Women Gave After Receiving Unsolicited Pregnancy Advice

drunk texts on twitter | thumbnail text - courtney @cmofosho At 2 am while drunk, I found a petition for McDonald's to bring back snack wraps and I sent it to 8 different people to sign.. 4:04 PM · Jun 27, 2021 · Twitter for iPhone

Golden Drunk Texts To Enjoy While Reminiscing About The Weekend

Parenting Tweets From Parents Who deserve An Award For Keeping It Together| Thumbnail text - Maryfairyboberry @maryfairybobrry I'm barely awake and already my toddler is crying because I won't put him in the trash can 4:47 PM · Sep 18, 2021 · Twitter for iPhone 178 Retweets 15 Quote Tweets 1,494 Likes

Parenting Tweets From Parents Who deserve An Award For Keeping It Together

Parents Tweet About The Epic Highs And Lows Of School Picture Day| Thumbnail text - Mommy Cusses @mommy_cusses ... Settle down, school picture day packages. I don't need a body pillow with my son's face embroidered on it for $400. 8:47 PM · 9/30/16 · Twitter for Android 570 Retweets 27 Quote Tweets 1,569 Likes

Parents Tweet About The Epic Highs And Lows Of School Picture Day

Mansplaining Experiences That Show Mansplaining Really Isn't Going Anywhere| Thumbnail text - Camille Corbett @TheWittyGirl Don't move to LA unless you're ready for a dude whose parents pay their rent to mansplain socialism to you. 1:32 AM · Sep 29, 2021 · Twitter for

Mansplaining Experiences That Show Mansplaining Really Isn't Going Anywhere

Funny tweets about psycho roommates | thumbnail text - Avery Edison @aedison ... every time i drink milk i remember my roommate who used to put powdered milk in his milk so he could drink "more milk per milk" 6:59 PM · Apr 14, 2021 · Twitter Web App

'Psycho Roommates' Of Twitter Are Getting Out Of Hand (April 18, 2021)

People Who Made Their Parents Want To Return Them| thumbnail text - 288 D Dad > Today 6:21 PM Do you have 3 nose rings now? Yes sir! Delivered When will it end

People Who Made Their Parents Want To Return Them

people who embarrassed themselves on the internet in really awkward moments | Text - If you were 32 weeks pregnant, and your spouse posts a meme in a private group that you're not in, that says "I only date antivaxxers because you only have to pay child support for 8 years instead of 18" What would your thoughts be? He says it's not about me

Awkward Moments Which Take 'Awkward' To A New Level

Hilarious Astrology Tweets That We Definitely Got A Kick Out Of| Thumbnail text - Astro Poets ... @poetastrologers Scorpio: I'm the saddest person who ever lived Therapist: ok relax 8:28 PM · 9/25/21 · Twitter for iPhone 819 Retweets 199 Quote Tweets 6,089 Likes

Extra Astrology Tweets That We Definitely Got A Kick Out Of

womens memes which men will never relate to | thumbnail text - me getting two bottles of wine at the store and telling myself one is for tonight and one is for tomorrow night Me at 6am applying makeup half awake & half dead trying to cover up how tired I am

A Fresh Batch Of Women's Memes Which Men Will Never Relate To

tweets about ghosting | thumbnail text - @Target If ghosts are Halloween, why am getting ghosted all year round? 6:26 PM Sep 23, 2021 Khoros Publishing App

Toxic Tweets About Ghosting Just In Time For Spooky Season

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“Focus on being a real man": Grandma smashes 7-year-old grandson's lego set to spite his dad, he bans her from their home until she apologises

“Focus on being a real man": Grandma smashes 7-year-old grandson's lego set to spite his dad, he bans her from their home until she apologises

24-year-old refuses to share new Wi-Fi password until influencer roommate agrees to remove videos that show her sleeping in the background: “I don't think I'm asking for much - just basic privacy in my own home?”

24-year-old refuses to share new Wi-Fi password until influencer roommate agrees to remove videos that show her sleeping in the background: “I don't think I'm asking for much - just basic privacy in my own home?”

19 and 20-year-old bio sisters abandon their 9-year-old stepsister, mom gets tough love from her sister about it: “If you hadn’t lied to your daughter, then maybe she wouldn’t be hurting”

19 and 20-year-old bio sisters abandon their 9-year-old stepsister, mom gets tough love from her sister about it: “If you hadn’t lied to your daughter, then maybe she wouldn’t be hurting”

Flashback to the 90s With These Iconic Memes That Tickle Our Nostalgia Bone

Flashback to the 90s With These Iconic Memes That Tickle Our Nostalgia Bone

Mom refuses to straighten 1.5 year old daughter's curly hair for sister-in-law bride that demands matching flower girls: "It's a ridiculous request for a toddler!"

Mom refuses to straighten 1.5 year old daughter's curly hair for sister-in-law bride that demands matching flower girls: "It's a ridiculous request for a toddler!"

26 Star Wars Memes for Starry-Eyed Couples Engaging the Hyperdrive on the Millennium Falcon

26 Star Wars Memes for Starry-Eyed Couples Engaging the Hyperdrive on the Millennium Falcon