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Week's Best 'Women Roasting Men' Tweets (September 23, 2020)

The well-known adage, "Hell hath no fury like a scorned woman armed with a Twitter account," has neven been more accurate. And this week's collection of women roasting men on Twitter are here to prove it. We've scoured the internet for the funniest tweets of women unleashing all their fury onto men, and they're as brutal as ever. And when you're done with these, here's some more to keep you entertained!

funniest women roasting men tweets of the week - Text - Roxi Horror @roxiqt WOMEN: When I had my IUD inserted, I blacked out from the pain but it wasn't a big deal MEN: Condoms are uncomfy :( If I have to wear one, this is going to be the worst day of my life :(
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Funniest Dad Tweets Of The Week (August 22, 2020)

The dads of Twitter don't get enough credit for succinctly summing up the joys, woes, trials, and tribulations of parenting within the confines of Twitter's 280 character limit. So, we take great pleasure in finding the funniest tweets written by all the dads out there and putting them together in one place for you each week. Here is your weekly haul of funniest dad tweets for you to scroll through, and here are some more for when you're done.

funniest dad tweets of the week - Text - Dadman Walking @dadmann_walking I can clean my car, vacuum it squeaky clean. Put my kids in. Give them absolutely nothing and there's 52 lbs of crumbs in the seats when they get out. This is how I know children are 98% made up of crumbs.
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People Let Their Keyboards Autocomplete Apologies, Funny Twitter Thread

I think everyone can admit that technology has essentially taken over our lives, and we are now ruled by our phones. And it's not just the younger generation; it's all of us, whether we like to admit it or not. But for all the good that technology does, one thing it can't do is express real human emotion, however much it may try. And autocomplete certainly does try. I'm sure we can all count on two hands the number of times autocorrect has f*cked us over in a text conversation? Twitter user @NihachuEatsCats put this to the test and Tweeted, "type "I'm sorry for being" and let your keyboard finish it for you." The results, were of course, bizarre. Check some of them out below.

funny twitter thread of people letting their keyboards autocomplete their apologies | Text - Karma @OniRevenant Im sorry for being so late to the other penis party ash @NihachuEatsCats · Sep 17 type "I'm sorry for being" and let your keyboard finish it for you
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Funniest Tweets Written By Women Last Week (September 21, 2020)

We're back with your weekly catch of the funniest tweets written by women over the past seven days, and as usual, they don't fail to disappoint. A venting woman is funny at the best of times, but when she's limited to 280 characters, every word counts, so you can be sure it will be golden. Scroll through these nuggets of humor, and then scroll through some more when you're done. Twitter is the gift that keeps on giving!






funniest women tweets we came across this week - Text - Rachel @femaleredhead girls be like "happy birthday to the craziest person i know" and it's just sarah
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Funniest Parenting Tweets Of The Week (September 20, 2020)

Another week has gone by, which means another week of parents doing their best with their little ones. But, as with everything in life, parenting comes with good and bad days. And when the bad days strike, Twitter is there as a platform to vent on, filled with parents who will empathize with your struggles and spur you on. Here is a list of the funniest parenting tweets we came across this week, where parents try to keep their offspring alive without losing too much of their sanity. Have kids, they said, it will be fun, they said.

funniest parenting tweets of the week - thumbnail | Text - mark @TheCatWhisprer Fool me once, shame on you. Fool me between 2 and 50 times and you're my 5yo getting out of bed at night.
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Funniest Relationship Tweets of The Week (September 18, 2020)

Relationships - can't live with 'em, can't live without 'em. And if you're living with one, you can bet someone is going through the same frustrations that you are. Here are this week's funniest relationship tweets that we came across, collected, and put in a handy list for you to scroll through and relate hard. And when you're done, here are some more. You're welcome!


funniest relationship tweets of the week - cover pic | Text - Goats? @Gooooats It's unfair of my wife to assume that I'm the one who absentmindedly put the milk away in the cereal cabinet. I mean, I definitely did it, but she shouldn't just assume.
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People Confess 'Most Feral Thing' They Did Over Past Six Months, Funny Twitter Thread

The past six months have been extremely tough on everyone, whether you've been stuck at home or not. But for those who haven't left the house much, it's easy to fall into some unhealthy living standards when you don't need to get up for work. From staying in your pajamas all day to not using cutlery anymore, people are slowly regressing into infant, feral-like habits. Podcaster and comic book artist @drewtoothpaste asked Twitter to "tell me the most feral thing you have done in the past six months of virus" after admitting that he ate a bag of frozen french fries for dinner. As usual, the responses didn't disappoint, and people began admitting all the gross habits they've picked up during the quarantine period. What are your feral practices?

funny tweets about feral things people have been doing during quarantine | Text - KDramasNSilents @KDramasNSilents Replying to @drewtoothpaste Ate an entire diced raw cabbage out if a bowl cuz i got tired partway through prep and didn't want to cook anymore. And then I did it again with the cabbage i bought to replace that cabbage.
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Week's Best 'Women Roasting Men' Tweets (September 16, 2020)

We're back with a fresh haul of women roasting men tweets, and they're as fabulous as ever. Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned, especially a woman who has Twitter. So Scroll through, relate and laugh at these scathing reviews of men by women and then check out last week's selection for even more humor.




funniest women roasting men tweets of the week | Text - Alyssa Schoener @alyssa_schoener I once asked this guy why he was ignoring me when I clearly showed interest in him and he responded with "when did u show interest in me?" Like hm idk maybe when I had sex with u
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Funniest Dad Tweets Of The Week (August 15, 2020)

The dads of Twitter are a funny bunch who are just winging it at parenting and hoping for the best. All while whining about it on the internet Twitter, of course, because men love to make mountains out of molehills. Hello man-flu! Anyway, we've collected the funniest dad tweets from this week for your viewing pleasure. Scroll down, laugh, and then check out last week's in case you missed them.

funniest dad tweets of the week - thumbnail text - The Dad THE DAD @thedad feel so bad I annoyed my son by making him pause YouTube for 2 seconds so he could come get the sandwich I made and cut into perfect triangles for him, my little prince
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Funny Twitter Thread On How Some Men Apologize

A sincere apology means owning your mistake, acknowledging what you did wrong, and putting plans in place to ensure it doesn't happen again. This is the best way for the person you've wronged to see how sincere you are and to be able to trust you again. But some people aren't very good at apologizing, especially men. Twitter user @aj_fairley tweeted, "Apologize like a man...GOOOO" and the results from women are golden. Let's just say that the women of Twitter aren't too impressed with the apology skills (or lack thereof) of the men in their lives. Check out their hilariously relatable responses below.





funny texts about men apologizing Text - Lemon of Lime @EMaietta Replying to @aj_fairley *pretends nothing happened* Oh, you're still mad? I thought we were past that
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Funniest Tweets Written By Women Last Week (September 14, 2020)

Women are great, aren't they? Especially when they're funny, and more specifically, when they're funny on Twitter. Airing your grievances, woes, gripes, and rants, all in a sarcastic 280 character tweet, is bound to induce a chuckle or two, and we live for that. On that note, here are this week's funniest tweets by women for you to scroll through. And here are some more for when you've finished.




 

funniest women tweets we came across this week - text Jess Carpenter @JessCarpWrites Overly healthy people be like, "Just mix oats, organic soil, a splash of almond milk, and a leaf from the world's tallest tree and you've got the EASIEST, MOST PERFECT, chocolate chip cookies
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Funniest Parenting Tweets Of The Week (September 13, 2020)

We're back with your weekly roundup of the funniest parenting tweets we saw this week. AKA, a collection of parents venting about their little darlings in 280 characters or fewer, to receive consolation from other parents who are also sick of their offspring. Have kids they said, it will be fun they said. Yeah, right! Got an annoying child? Twitter is the place to let it all out!




funniest parenting tweets of the week - text - Kids_kubed +1 @Kids_kubed 7: Mommy, remember how I collect acorns in the fall? Me: Yes! You collected so many last year 7: and remember how I told you to keep them? Me: 7: Can I have them now? Me:
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Michaels’ Store Website Has Function To Chat With Other Shoppers: Funny Twitter Thread

Customer satisfaction is an essential component of any store's retention strategy. A necessary part of this is finding new and exciting ways to engage consumers and bring in new ones. Michaels, a chain of arts and craft stores based in the USA, has come up with a great approach to this by having a live chat feature on their homepage, which allows you to interact with other customers. Now I know what you're thinking; that seems pointless, right? Think again! A Twitter user discovered this exciting feature on the company's website and posted his findings to Twitter, together with some screenshots of the chat. His post quickly went viral, and thousands of customers began to try it out for themselves. We've put together some of the most hilarious and heartwarming conversations below. Would you use this feature on your regular store's website?

funny tweets of Michael's store website online chat function with customers
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Funniest Dad Tweets Of The Week (August 8, 2020)

Each week we bring you the funniest parenting tweets we've seen over the past seven days. But did you ever notice that the majority of them are from moms? Well, we did, and it got us wondering: where are the funny dads of Twitter?! So, we set about searching for them, and we struck gold. The dads of Twitter are hilarious, and we think they should get more of the limelight. Their honest tweets about the challenges and triumphs of parenting will make you feel less alone in the challenges you face, and so we present to you, dear readers, a list of the funniest dad tweets we saw this week. And next week we'll bring you the same. And the week after that. And the same after that.

funniest dad tweets of the week- cover pic | Text - No Idea: Daddy Blog @byclintedwards I'm 3 kids and 13 years into parenting and I went to bed last night like an idiot assuming my 6yo would sleep in because she was up late, and now I want to yell at my earlier self "that's not how it works you dumbass! You're in hell, remember?" But I won't because l'm an optimist
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Twitter Users Reveal Ridiculous Statements Overheard At The Movie Theater

Remember the days when we could watch movies in the theater without a care in the world? Our biggest worry was which size popcorn to get (large obviously) or where to sit (back row, middle seats, duh). But those days are distant memories, and who knows when we'll be allowed back into theaters. We wouldn't even mind the obnoxious idiots who talk throughout the movie, or who have their phones on loud—just bring back normality, please! Joining us in movie theater nostalgia is writer Mike Ginn, who recently tweeted: "The thing I miss most about movie theaters is overhearing someone say the dumbest f—king thing I've ever heard before the previews start." His tweet went viral, and he received thousands of replies from people, all sharing the dumbest things they've overheard at the movies. What's yours?

tweets of dumb things people overheard at movie theaters | tweet about 127 hours movie @ Save CJ @oboe_cop Replying to @shutupmikeginn I went to see 127 hours at the cinema. Part way through a lady in the row behind me said l hope he's not going to be stuck behind that rock for the whole film
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Funniest Tweets Written By Women Last Week (September 7, 2020)

There's never a week that goes by where the funny women of Twitter fail to brighten up our day. They've got humor, sass, and it, which they manage to condense into 280 characters of fewer. Here are this week's funniest tweets written by women, and when you're done laughing at these, here are last week's to chuckle at because you can never have too many!

funniest tweets written by women - cover pic | Agnes @Agnessjon Just when I thought this year couldn't get any worse I just heard on the news that we might be able to have family dinners as usual this Christmas
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