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Funniest Relationship Tweets From This Week (September 11, 2020)

It's that time of the week again, where we bring you the funniest relationship tweets we found over the past seven days. It's all fun and games being in love until your partner drives you so crazy that you have to vent about them to the world on Twitter. Can't live with them, can't live without them, eh? Then, there's the single folk out there who are happily unattached and not getting frustrated by anyone. The grass is always greener. Anyway, enjoy these twitter gems and then check out last week's in case you missed them.


funniest relationship tweets of the week - cover pic | text - Satirical Mommy @MommySatirical Marriage tip: if your wife repeatedly asks why something is where it is - "It's not bothering anybody" is NOT the correct response
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Mom Uses Optical Illusions To Dress Daughter In Food Fashion

Instagram is full of influencers who claim to be fashionistas. However, it's hard to stand out and sell your style in a unique way when there are so many others doing the same thing as you. But one mom has figured out a creative way to encourage hers and her daughter's love for fashion. Painter Alya Chaglar sculpts food into the shape of dresses and holds them up against her young daughter Stefani, making it seem like she is wearing the food clothes. From pizza to broccoli, her fabulous food fashion looks so fun to make. Stefanie certainly looks like she enjoys the poses, and it's clear that a young, budding fashionista is in the works!

pictures of girl in food Fashion - cover pic little girl posing in dressed made out of leaves and pizza
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Funny, Satirical Cartoons Explaining The Do's And Don'ts Of Parenting

Nothing can prepare you for the challenging yet rewarding journey of parenthood. Sure, there are parenting books, websites, and experts who can tell you all about what to expect, but it's all theoretical until you experience it yourself. And even then, some parents manage to f*ck it up in a big way, which makes me believe even more that parenting is a privilege, not a right. Someone has created some hilariously satirical cartoons about the do's and don'ts of parenting, probably paying homage to the parents who don't have a clue. Scroll through and laugh at these tips and tricks for keeping your children alive.

Funny, Satirical Cartoons Explaining The Do's And Don'ts Of Parenting - cover pic | cartoons of shopping with baby DO DON'T Exercising Baby YES NO
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Funny Memes Explaining How Different People Shower

Everyone has their own individual shower ritual. For some, it's rinse, lather, repeat. For others, shower time can mean karaoke concerts, an opportunity to let out all the tears they've been holding in that day, or just a time to unwind and think about nothing. Whatever floats your boat. But did you ever wonder if certain people shower the same way just because they're from the same place? I mean, it's probably nonsense, but these memes about the different ways people shower are hilarious. Check them out.

funny memes about how different people shower differently - cover pic man in shower pretending to be British and American | American people shower same as dummy First get nice and wet. Then get gun | British people shower same as idiot get nice and wet. Then get teabags.
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Funny, Brutal Letters Of Disappointment From Girls To Their “Exes” (September 11, 2020)

Have you ever been on a hilarious, horrific, or cringe-worthy date? We assume the answer is yes, because, well, who hasn't? How nice would it have been to tell the douchebag in the question exactly what you thought of him? Of course, some women choose to dish out a harsh truth after an awful date, but it's not worth the emotional energy for others. Because let's face it - a man taking constructive criticism post-date? Hard to imagine. We've teamed up with To The Guys I've (Kinda) Dated - An Instagram account created by women, for women, who submit letters containing all the things they've always wanted to say to the disappointing men they've dated. Scroll through this week's haul and then check out last week's in case you missed them.

letters of disappointment from women to guys they've dated | text - Dear Dre, Awesome been sticking over year but can't accept my Facebook friend request. Find new FWB. Love Jenna
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Funny Results Of Adding 'Without A Penis' To Famous Quotes And Movie Lines

Famous quotes from movies, philosophers, world leaders, and authors are well-known for a reason; they are (mostly) inspiring, impactful, and smart. Words are powerful. But when you alter the quotes, even just by a little bit, their meanings can change drastically, and their impact can be lost. This was proved by a recent AskReddit thread, which called for people to add "without a penis" onto the ends of famous quotes or movie lines. The results are hilarious and show just how powerful three little words can be.  Here are some of the funniest ones!

Funny Results Of Adding 'Without A Penis' To Famous Quotes And Movie Lines cover pic | storme9 4 points 6 hours ago Catwoman Batman don't owe these people anymore given them everything without penis."
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Woman Engaged To Random Man Who Told Her To Find A BF On Twitter

They say that if you go searching for love, you won't find it. Instead, it's best to focus on living your best life, and the right one will present themselves in the most unexpected circumstances. But sometimes, love can manifest itself in a way you never thought possible even when you search for it. One couple who knows a thing or two about this are Twitter users @KatieKatCubs and @TBrown_80, who have just got engaged three years after meeting on Twitter. Terry replied to Katie's tweet about her despair in finding a man, telling her that the best place to find love was Twitter. He wasn't wrong! Read their crazy story below.

Story of Woman who got Engaged To Random Man Who Told Her To Find A BF On Twitter - cover pic | twitter conversation bad Katie @KatieKatCubs Asked married guys at work where meet single guys. Here's they came up with 1. Strip club 2. Any bar, anywhere at 1:30am
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Awful Profile Pictures From Russian Dating Sites

Recently, we covered the eight profile pics women really need to stop using on dating apps. From duck face selfies to pictures with exotic animals, they're all as bad as each other. But nothing, and I mean nothing, can prepare you for the ridiculously weird profile pictures that Russians use on dating sites. As you scroll through these pictures, you'll cringe on behalf of the people posting them, and feel sorry for the people who have to swipe on them. Honestly, they are too much!

Awful Profile Pictures From Russian Dating Sites | woman tied to a bed with sausages | woman posing with a chicken
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Week's Best 'Women Roasting Men' Tweets (September 9, 2020)

We're back with this week's haul of funniest women roasting men tweets. We know how much you love reading women ruthlessly taking down the men in their lives using 280 characters or fewer, and we love scouring Twitter to find them for you. So pour yourself a cup of something, sit back, and enjoy scrolling through. And when you're done with these, check out last week's funniest women roasting men tweets, in case you missed them.


funniest women roasting men tweets of the week- cover pic | Text - Priscilla @itsPKav give a man a fish and he will eat for a day. teach a man how to cook a fish and he will immediately forget what you said.
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Dark And Raunchy ABC Book For Adults

Learning the ABC is a significant milestone for children because it is the first step towards learning how to read and write. Most children use alphabet books with corresponding pictures or information to help them memorize the letters; A is for apple, B is for ball. The pictures help capture the imagination of children and also learn about the world. But who says education needs to stop at adulthood? Illustrator Toby Leigh has created ABC for Adults — "twisting the meaning of innocent, childlike words into hysterically funny yet terrifying adult themes." According to his website, Toby made the parody version of "the classic ABC books from yesteryear" because, "Unfortunately, we all grew up and became paranoid, cynical adults filled with fear and hatred. But don't despair, this new book will help guide you and your family through this difficult phase of your existence." Check out a sample of the hilarious works below, where H is for heart attack, and Z is for zippers… in bondage suits. 

pictures of abc from dark adult book - cover pic Z zip leather face mask N nose patient having plastic surgery
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Worst Reasons People Were Dumped

As with everything in life, relationships come with risks. Sure, you could fall desperately in love, get married, and live happily ever after. I mean, that's the dream, right? Alternatively, you could fall for someone, and just as you finally feel secure, they dump you in a soul-crushing, heart-wrenching act of cruelty, causing you to lose all faith and hope in love. It's a real gamble. And the truth is, being dumped suck. It can bruise your ego, make you feel rejected, and question whether or not what you had was real for the other person. But some dumpings are more brutal than others, and these Redditers are sharing the harshest reasons their exes ended their relationship. What's the worst reason someone broke up with you? Or that you dumped someone?

worst reasons people were dumped - cover pic story about being dumped for being tested for autism
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Michaels’ Store Website Has Function To Chat With Other Shoppers: Funny Twitter Thread

Customer satisfaction is an essential component of any store's retention strategy. A necessary part of this is finding new and exciting ways to engage consumers and bring in new ones. Michaels, a chain of arts and craft stores based in the USA, has come up with a great approach to this by having a live chat feature on their homepage, which allows you to interact with other customers. Now I know what you're thinking; that seems pointless, right? Think again! A Twitter user discovered this exciting feature on the company's website and posted his findings to Twitter, together with some screenshots of the chat. His post quickly went viral, and thousands of customers began to try it out for themselves. We've put together some of the most hilarious and heartwarming conversations below. Would you use this feature on your regular store's website?

funny tweets of Michael's store website online chat function with customers
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Funniest Dad Tweets Of The Week (August 8, 2020)

Each week we bring you the funniest parenting tweets we've seen over the past seven days. But did you ever notice that the majority of them are from moms? Well, we did, and it got us wondering: where are the funny dads of Twitter?! So, we set about searching for them, and we struck gold. The dads of Twitter are hilarious, and we think they should get more of the limelight. Their honest tweets about the challenges and triumphs of parenting will make you feel less alone in the challenges you face, and so we present to you, dear readers, a list of the funniest dad tweets we saw this week. And next week we'll bring you the same. And the week after that. And the same after that.

funniest dad tweets of the week- cover pic | Text - No Idea: Daddy Blog @byclintedwards I'm 3 kids and 13 years into parenting and I went to bed last night like an idiot assuming my 6yo would sleep in because she was up late, and now I want to yell at my earlier self "that's not how it works you dumbass! You're in hell, remember?" But I won't because l'm an optimist
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Twitter Users Reveal Ridiculous Statements Overheard At The Movie Theater

Remember the days when we could watch movies in the theater without a care in the world? Our biggest worry was which size popcorn to get (large obviously) or where to sit (back row, middle seats, duh). But those days are distant memories, and who knows when we'll be allowed back into theaters. We wouldn't even mind the obnoxious idiots who talk throughout the movie, or who have their phones on loud—just bring back normality, please! Joining us in movie theater nostalgia is writer Mike Ginn, who recently tweeted: "The thing I miss most about movie theaters is overhearing someone say the dumbest f—king thing I've ever heard before the previews start." His tweet went viral, and he received thousands of replies from people, all sharing the dumbest things they've overheard at the movies. What's yours?

tweets of dumb things people overheard at movie theaters | tweet about 127 hours movie @ Save CJ @oboe_cop Replying to @shutupmikeginn I went to see 127 hours at the cinema. Part way through a lady in the row behind me said l hope he's not going to be stuck behind that rock for the whole film
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Babies Are Great At Ruining Photoshoots

You're probably all familiar with 'Instagram VS reality'; the concept that things are never as Instagram perfect behind the scenes as they appear in the finished product. Well, this isn't just something that influencers suffer from. Babies also have a hard time living up to the Pinterest-esque photoshoot ideas that their parents had in mind for them. After all, it's not easy telling a newborn baby to give their best duck face! Check out these hilarious but adorable baby photoshoot fails, and don't tell me your heard isn't melting.

pictures of baby photoshoot fails | funny newborn photography expectation vs reality infants lying face down hilarious
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Your 100% Factually (Maybe) Accurate September Horoscopes

September has begun, and you know what that means? There's only one more month until we can say "next month, there's only one month until the last month of 2020." Did that give you a headache? Me too, but that's OK because Autumn brings with it pumpkin-spiced everything, and nothing bad can happen when you've got a Salted Caramel Pumpkin Latte in your hand. But let's not tempt fate.

Just in case, we've checked to see what the celestial bodies have in store for you this month. Because with one quarter left of 2020, surely things can't get any worse. Right?! Here are your September horoscopes, based on... well, not much to be honest with you. 

pictures of satirical horoscopes zodiac signs - cover pic Libra | Libra (Sept 23 Oct 22 think unique because hormones are out wack right now, but news flash: so are everyone's s been crazy year and mood swings are off charts. Try and channel energy into some self-care this month, and invest some bath salts. Or some vodka. Or both!
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