funny twitter

man complains on Twitter that he can't get a date despite having 700lbs. of beef a year | thumbnail Text - Dangerously Beefy @vickers_stephen 000 My housing is paid for. I make a good salary. I get health insurance, 401k, 700 Ibs of beef a year, and I live on a couple hundred acres. I'm a puncher by trade with a bachelors degree. And I swear you women would rather have a loser than a provider. It's sad

Man With 700lbs. Of Beef Can't Get A Date: Funny Twitter Thread

funniest relationship tweets of the week | thumbnail Text - Lil BOO @LizerReal Before marrying someone, listen long and hard to the sounds of their chewing because that's the soundtrack to the rest of your life.

Funniest Relationship Tweets of The Week (October 23, 2020)

funniest women roasting men tweets of the week | Text - ruthie @ruthkalkidan you let a man in your life now you irritated before 9 am

Week's Best 'Women Roasting Men' Tweets (October 21, 2020)

funniest dad tweets of the week - Text - bacon popsiclestein @Gupton68 If I learned just one thing as a parent, it's that by the 3rd kid they can be juggling samurai swords and hand grenades and you won't care as long as they're doing it quietly

Funniest Dad Tweets Of The Week (October 20, 2020)

funniest women tweets we came across this week | jodie @jodieegrace can't believe tik tok teens have just discovered yoga pants and they're calling them flared leggings hate here

Funniest Tweets Written By Women Last Week (October 19, 2020)

funniest parenting tweets of the week - thumbnail | Text - LizerReal My 5yo named her new kitten Penis. Penis is female.

Funniest Parenting Tweets

funny birth control tweets | thumbnail Text - Molly Priddy O @mollypriddy women: *grow up knowing sex is their responsibility, take birth control pills that mess up their bodies, get incredibly painful IUDS, avoid dark areas at night and problem men, all to avoid getting pregnant before they want* men: "ugh she wanted me to wear a condom"

Funny Birth Control Tweets To Laugh The Breakouts Away

funniest relationship tweets of the week | thumbnail Text - Jude D @heyitsJudeD Just squeezed my own boob and sighed hard in case your wondering how my sex life is going

Funniest Relationship Tweets of The Week (October 10, 2020)

funniest women tweets we came across this week | thumbnail Text - transgenda spenda @churchcunt Me: Women and men should get paid the same Men: So that means i can kick you in the stomach and then body slam you on the concrete and fart in your face? Since we equal now

Best 'Women Roasting Men' Tweets

funniest dad tweets of the week | Text - Rodney Lacroix @RodLacroix What I say: Be ready, we are leaving in five minutes. What the child hears: Get undressed. Start finger painting. Lose at least one shoe.

Funniest Dad Tweets Of The Week (October 13, 2020)

funniest women tweets we came across this week | thumbnail text Onyx @Allanah_Morales Y'all remember principals used sit our classes our teachers became fake nice af day lol

Funniest Tweets Written By Women Last Week (October 12, 2020)

funniest parenting tweets of the week | thumbnail Text - Professional Worrier @pro_worrier_ My 4yo is irate that she's not in our family pictures that were taken in 2012.. She was born in 2016

Funniest Parenting Tweets Of The Week

funniest women tweets we came across this week | thumbnail Text - Alyssa Schoener @alyssa_schoener Men are really lovey dovey in the morning because they realize they need love and intimacy to survive and then they fully wake up and become little demons

Week's Best 'Women Roasting Men' Tweets (October 7, 2020)

funniest dad tweets of the week - Text - Simon Holland @simoncholland Why would I pay for a haunted house when I can wake up to my kid silently standing by my bed at 5 AM.

Funniest Dad Tweets Of The Week

funny bad amazon movie reviews | thumbnail includes two reviews Text - Amazon Movie Reviews @AmznMovieRevws The Emoji Movie. Reviewed in the United States on February 19, 2020 Format: Prime Video I have an aggressive niece who likes to pick fights at her elementary school, and she even bit one of her classmates last August.

Twitter Account Of Bad Amazon Movie Reviews Is Too Funny

funniest women tweets we came across this week | thumbnail Text - Jessie @mommajessiec Sex is cool, but have you ever been running late and the person you're meeting texts they're running late?

Funny Tweets Written By Women

Trending Now

24 Parenting Memes That Accurately Describe a Day in the Life of the Modern Mom

24 Parenting Memes That Accurately Describe a Day in the Life of the Modern Mom

Dad skips daughter's rescheduled wedding to go on a motorcycle trip with his buddies after spending $22,500 on her first wedding, which she cancelled last-minute after a fight with her fiance: ‘I was stuck with the bill’

Dad skips daughter's rescheduled wedding to go on a motorcycle trip with his buddies after spending $22,500 on her first wedding, which she cancelled last-minute after a fight with her fiance: ‘I was stuck with the bill’

15 Mommy Must-Haves for an Easier Back-to-School

15 Mommy Must-Haves for an Easier Back-to-School

Ungrateful pregnant wife refuses to thank husband for building a nursery for their baby, he seeks advice from the internet: “A thank you goes a long way”

Ungrateful pregnant wife refuses to thank husband for building a nursery for their baby, he seeks advice from the internet: “A thank you goes a long way”

43 Satirical Girlboss Memes for Women Who 'Thrive' Under Pressure

43 Satirical Girlboss Memes for Women Who 'Thrive' Under Pressure

20 Sarcastic Vintage Illustrations For Those Who Have a Wicked Sense Of Humor

20 Sarcastic Vintage Illustrations For Those Who Have a Wicked Sense Of Humor