sex

Sometimes we do dumb things when we are drunk and horny. And sometimes those things are SO dumb they put us into some serious fucking credit card debt for years to come. Kind of like this woman, who was just trying to have some fun at a bachelorette party with a cruise ship employee until things got DRASTICALLY out of hand, leaving her stranded in a foreign country. BUT! She was generous enough to share this hilariously awful sexcapade with the universe by putting it on the Internet and for that, we thank her and as always, we do not judge.

For anyone who has been living under a rock, the term 'sexting' stands for a combination of sex and texting. Sexting is the act of sending sexual text messages. It often also involves sending nude or seminude photos and explicit videos of yourself. Sexting can be a lot of fun and can certainly spice up a relationship, especially during times of absence. With more technological devices than we know what to do with and all of them somehow linked together, unsafe sexting can be a real danger. Just ask this girl, whose virtual sexcapade was unfortunately shared with her entire family! Please enjoy this Sexcapade story, and PLEASE practice safe sexting!

The Office isn't just a mockumentary; it's also a never-ending source of one-liners that can be used to make any situation infinitely more awkward. Michael Scott's favorite line, "That's what she said," is great for turning anything into a sexual innuendo, but when you're actually in bed with someone, there are some quotes from The Office that you should probably avoid. Because, in the wise words of Dwight, "Whenever I'm about to do something, I think, 'Would an idiot do that?' and if they would, I do not do that thing." So, to help you not be an idiot, we thought it would be fun to find some of Dunder Mifflin's famous quotes that you should NEVER say to someone in bed, or worse, want to hear someone you're in bed with, say to you. Unless they're a fellow Office groupie, in which case you're winning. And if you're in bed with someone who isn't a Michael Scott groupie, then what are you even doing with your life?

The walk of shame is universally known as the strut that happens the morning after sex. However, the people of Twitter have been redefining the phrase as of late. It's not just about sex anymore. Apparently, it's about every mortifying moment ever. We can use "walk of shame" to describe everything now! Doesn't have to do with the morning after? No problem - you still have a right to use it! What a time to be alive. Scroll down for the best tweets we read about the walk of shame this week, and let us know which shameful moment you relate to most in the comments.

We've all made bad decisions, especially when there is lots of alcohol, a sexy Australian, and a high libido involved. Right?? This girl certainly has. This Sexcapade story is one that starts off seemingly innocent but lands a girl in real danger.  Keep in mind these things are only funny because no one actually got hurt! If you have a hilariously bad/funny/downright weird sexual experience to share with the entire universe, don't be shy! Share that shit right here. 

As the old dating adage goes, good d*ck can imprison you. Take it from this lady who knows from an unfortunate personal experience! A few margaritas and a beautiful Hawaiian beach seemed like a fabulous start to any vacation hookup story...until the cops show up and you are solely responsible for ruining someone's wedding! Whoops! This cringe-worthy Sexcapade story is hilarious as it is horrifying and simply TOO good not to share with the Cheezcake community. If you have a good Sexcapade to share with us, please do so here for a chance to be (anonymously) featured!

At some point in every man-loving human's life, they will (hopefully) discover their 'unicorn penis.' This is essentially the 'perfect' penis, whatever that may mean to the beholder. Whether it be the perfect size, girth, or shape, or it's just simply attached to a person who has given you the absolute best sex of your life. However, it can often result in awful decision-making and potentially put you in prison. This woman, fortunately, did NOT end up in prison, but when she finally got a chance to reunite with the man attached to the beloved unicorn member, things got, well...weird. Read about this hilariously awful Sexcapade on Cheezcake! 

Sometimes a girl just needs some vitamin D and it's not always the most convenient time or place, but you simply have to make due. Like this woman, who forgot that she had some visitors and was forced to improvise which might ultimately force her out of her own apartment building! Read this Sexcapade story of sexual prowess and hilarious debauchery when too much alcohol and a high libido put her in a terribly awkward situation for many 'a building employees to see!

There is something about the sweet smell of summertime and the pure existential joy of vacation that really gets the hormones flowing! Whether it be the tanned summer bodies, the excess tequila, or a combination of both, nothing says 'livin' libido loca' quite like a summer vacation! We have teamed up with dating blog The Single Society to share with you some of the wildest summertime sexcapade stories for your reading pleasure. If YOU have a wild/funny/cringeworthy summertime hookup story, be sure to spread good karma and share it with the world here! 

Tinder is a great way to have anonymous sex if that's what you're looking for. With an infinite amount of strangers readily available at the swipe of a finger, it's easy to find someone for casual, no-strings-attached sex whenever you want. But is anyone as anonymous as they seem? They say that there are only six degrees of separation between everyone, or, in simpler terms, all people are six, or fewer, social connections away from each other. So, in reality, the likelihood of someone you know, knowing the person you are sleeping with, is relatively high. 

One guy learned this the hard way when he discovered that the older woman he had met on Tinder and been sleeping with for three months was his coworker's mom.  The worst part? She insisted on coming clean to her son. Honesty isn't always the best policy, folks! Yeah, we want to die on his behalf too. He documented the whole story on the popular subreddit, TIFU (Today I F—ked Up). Read it below, and cringe along with us!

If you're wondering how in the world the female psyche works when it comes to sexuality, we got you covered. A Redditor asked Reddit women how they let men know when they're horny, and the thread totally blew up. While some women are more discreet and demure, other women are way more direct, choosing to tell men exactly what they want. Apparently, simply saying "I'm horny" will work wonders. How do you let dudes know you're ready to rumble? Let us know in the comments. 

Pop culture makes it seem like everyone's doing the dirty, but there are many men and women out there that have zero sexual or romantic experience. Would lack of experience make or break a relationship? A Redditor started a thread asking people if they would be willing to date someone with zero experience, and many people were okay with it, whereas other people said it depends on their age. What's your preference? Let us know in the comments. 

After a long year, many single people of the world are excited about ending the awful sexual dry spell in which we were forced to endure. Sexcapdes is a column about hilarious and cringe-worthy stories of naughty sexual debauchery gone fabulously wrong! Today's Sexcapade story is one where lady's night really took a shitty turn when she attempted to bring her date home for some adult fun only to have her night be completely ruined by no one other than her furry little feline friend. Brace yourselves!

You've read countless horoscope predictions, but none of them have ever solely focused on what's really important - sex, duh! The universe runs on sex, hence sex is intrinsically connected to the stars. What I'm telling you that your sex life is based entirely on your astrology, not to mention Mercury being in retrograde. It seems like Mercury is always in retrograde, but I digress. Back to your sex life.

We're thrilled to present your monthly HOEroscopes, where we determine your sexual future based on the cosmos. Because science, b*tch. May the D be ever in your favor this week. 

So you locked down a date for the weekend, and you're ready for a night out on the town with your dude - and the sexy times that are likely to come next. Naturally, you wanna feel your sexiest self, so you go through your typical d*ck appointment routine. But what does that look like? Apparently, it's not the same for every woman. We uncovered a two-year-old Reddit thread about what women's usual prep looks like, and responses range from super meticulous to straight-up not giving a f*ck. Does your routine match up to the ones below? 

It's a tale as old as time. Sh*t happens when you drink too much tequila. People get horny, can't figure out where the f*ck they are, phones die...you get the picture! Well, this person certainly does! Read about this hilarious Sexcapade story where a woman lets alcohol and her vagina drive the metaphorical bus which leads her right into a ridiculous situation of sexual debauchery... but with a bit of a detour!