amazon

So, we don't know if you've already heard, it's not like there was an overwhelming amount of news coverage about it or something, but for some unknown reason the CEO of Amazon just launched his little body into space. If you're anything like us, your first response was probably something along the lines of, "Okay, but WTF?" It's the natural reaction we think. Who knows, maybe he made some amazing discovery during his brief time in space, or maybe this proves some people just don't know how to spend their money... At all.

You've heard of hot girl summer, but have you heard of hot girl spring? News flash: April showers bring May flowers, so we are currently in the midst of spring, and you need to be adequately prepared. The Cheezcake ladies have prepared a list of things you need to live your best life this spring season. Sorry in advance for the excessive amount of flowers coming your way, but also there is no need to apologize for all the flower power that spring inspires. Who's ready to look silky smooth in never-ending flower-themed ensembles? Scroll down to get into the spring spirit with us! 

Getting dumped is never easy. But getting dumped over text requires some serious self-reflection. I'm definitely not telling you to ask yourself, "What did I do wrong?" Rather, "How the hell did I let this dweeb into my life in the first place." Ladies, we need standards. Yes, it is always difficult to tell if someone is going to f*ck you over, and it's better to love and get hurt than to never love at all... However, if you're like me, we are also amazing at ignoring red flags really early on.

So next time someone disresp-exts you, here is all you need to pick yourself back up again.

The marketing industry is one industry, selling women sh*t they definitely don't need since the beginning of time. Who's ready to go on an online shopping spree, where we ogle all things "for women" that don't really make sense? Then again, who are we to say what doesn't make sense for women? I'm sure some of you out there might actually be down for the products listed below. Perhaps they are the height of fashion, but I'm personally going in literally the opposite direction of these products. Except for maybe the booty wipes. They sound extremely innovative. Anyhoo, scroll down for my personal take on the most ridiculous products targeted towards women.  

Valentine's day is the day of love, and this year I decided to treat myself to a little self-love (the most important kind)! Especially after the craziness that was 2020, I think we've all earned the right to focus on self-pleasure. Plus, there are LOTS of health benefits to orgasms--they can relieve stress, cramps, headaches...they're kind of a cure-all. Why are doctors not prescribing them more?? In my quest to give my V the perfect V-day, I did quite a bit of searching and eventually settled on the Sweet Treat Spinnator toy from Satisfyer. I chose it (over a regular vibrator or a suction toy) based on its adorable design, its affordability, and its spinning mechanism that I was curious to try. If you want to learn more or if you just want to enjoy more jokes about my vagina, read on.

If you're anything like me, you've had times where you've eaten so much that you've put yourself into a food coma. I mean, is there anything better than curling up on the couch after overeating on pasta and slipping into a beautiful, carb-filled dream? Nope, didn't think so. The only thing I can think of to make that nap any better would be to fall asleep on a giant food pillow. Whether it's a massive chicken wing, a wonton, or a donut, these pillows look good enough to eat and will elevate any food coma to new levels of deliciousness.

We've brought you the dinner plates with rude messages on, for when you want your guests to leave but don't want to tell them to their faces. And now, we bring you the oven gloves designed with offensive messages on them, to complete your far-from-polite kitchen set. And if you want to buy one for yourself, you can find them here.

When we're kids, we assume adults have it all figured out. But now that we're, we know that not to be the case. At all! Adulting is hard, and accomplishing even the most basic of tasks, is something to celebrate. We give little kids encouragement when they complete something objectively simple, and as adults, we should give ourselves equal credit.

Winks For Days is a company that creates adult merit badges for the simple everyday tasks that we should be doing but might struggle with. This is exactly the encouragement I'm talking about, and I'm obsessed! What do you think of them?

Being super-wealthy (and we're talking Jeff Bezos the founder of Amazon kind of wealthy), has its perks - the most obvious being that you can buy whatever you want, whenever you want. But one of the lesser-known hardships of being one of the richest men in the world is that it's actually harder than you think to spend that sort of money. A hilarious Twitter thread by Metro UK shows just how difficult it is to spend Bezos' net worth, which happens to be $189.3 billion. Read on and laugh, and be grateful that you don't have such a struggle in your life...

People have been keeping themselves entertained during lockdown in all sorts of ways. From recreating amateur paintings to dressing up while you walk your dog, you have to do whatever you can to keep busy. One woman decided to on a DIY project which involved getting free carpet samples on Amazon and making a cat scratcher. But things quickly got out of hand in a hilarious way, and she documented the whole thing on Imgur. Check out what happens when you "hack" Amazon...

Women lead busy lives. Balancing work and the family isn't easy, but we do it and we rock it. What's more, we are grateful for the inventions that are made specifically with women in mind, such as removable heels, secret bra pouches for our cash, and wireless bras that still give support. It's things like these that allow us to live our best, hassle-free lives. How many of these brilliant inventions would make your life that much easier? 

Online shopping is on the rise, especially now that shops are mostly closed to the public. This means more people are leaving reviews on the products they're buying, and some of them are the works of literary genius. From toilet brushes to beds that look like ice creams, here are some of the funniest reviews on Amazon, both new and old to get you chuckling over the weekend. Enjoy!

This woman is making this holiday season (and past ones) special by leaving out snacks for any and all carrier drivers! In a now viral video shared on Facebook, you can see just how happy the Amazon delivery guy is to see those snacks left especially for him! 

And if this isn't what the holiday season is about then we just don't know what is. 

Kathy Ouma, what a lovely and simple idea to help make people's day -- we hope this idea will inspire others (and it did us) and become the new normal! 

When this Imgur user was shopping online, she stumbled upon a review on a pair of yoga pants. This wasn't a review like all the others, this review took the pants to a new level, and quite honestly, we're not looking to buy the exact same pair. Why? Just scroll down to see for yourself.

These Amazon reviews are absolute gems. All of them. Sit back with your hot cup of joe and enjoy the hystericalness of these reviews. If you're more of a dark humor person, we've got some seriously good dark Amazon reviews for you. Honestly, does it get better than this? (The answer is no.) 

You know the feeling, explaining your situation to one customer service rep only to be transferred to another and repeat the entire cycle until you die. Or feel like dying. Amazon user Andrew decided to share his experience on Imgur: